Do we become more confident or simply stop caring?

Instagram. What a controversial platform. More than half of its users says that Instagram makes them feel miserable. Yet all of us still use it. I’ve pondered deleting the app, but I still haven’t done it. I was scrolling through it a couple of days ago and saw some comments on an influencers post with so much hate. Her response? This:


And since then I’ve been asking myself. Do we become more confident or do we simply stop caring what others think? Specifically relating to self image.

Do we wake up one morning and we no longer want to change anything about ourselves? Is it gradual? Is it a flip switch that switches unexpectedly?

My answer?

I don’t know.

For me personally, I have found that I am simply caring less. I don’ know if it changing because I am getting older, desensitising to all the media exposure, or something as simple as my husband telling me I’m beautiful every morning. I used to check every filter on Instagram when posting a photo, over analysing every corner of it, checking if my nose, eyes, body, arms, even fingers looked okay. Now, if the picture represents a fond memory, or I just like it, I post it. I have a filter I like (Aden) – I’ll plop it on, and post.

On top of that, as time passed, I have grown distracted by other seemingly more significant things.

The cliche saying goes something like:

It doesn’t get easier, you simply get stronger…or something along those lines.

That’s why I think it isn’t necessarily about ‘gaining self-confidence’ but its more about learning, over time, to care about other things.

And sometimes those other things are things that truly matter. And honestly sometimes those things are other trivial things that you didn’t think about before.

I mean, think about it. You really want to have an amazing day with your friends on the beach, but your first thought is likely that you do not want to wear a bathing-suit.

I guess all I’m trying to share here is if it’s about learning to care about other things instead of a magical outpouring of self-confidence, then how can I train myself out of confidence issues by caring about greater things?

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